Tag Archives: Ryan

December Update

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Balls at LACMA

Art?

A lot of things have changed since my last post so will attempt a catch-up and update everyone!

At the moment, I am down in SoCal staying at Ryan and Les’s apartment. Mostly here to see my boys and grandboys but also it’s an attempt to miss some of the nasty weather that is happening – and will continue to happen – for the next few months.

But getting back to where I left off…

In a bizarre twist, Chris is back on the periphery of my life – as a tenant in the condo! He had agreed to quit claim it to me as he has no interest in keeping it. When I found out that I may be able to do a loan mod on it, Susan and I spent a day cleaning it up and getting it ready to rent. I took the keys to the property rental people and was getting ready for them to go through the process and find me a tenant. That day, I got a phone call from Chris, asking if I had rented the place yet. And that he was interested in taking it! Immediately! Which meant that he had been asked to move out from his last place/relationship. I was astounded and backpedaled a bit and said I would think about it for a couple of hours and immediately called Susan! We discussed it and agreed it would work – but ONLY if he paid full rent and a security deposit up front and signed a lease. Which he did!

So now both rentals are occupied with rents coming in on time. The Port Angeles house paperwork should be completed and waiting for me when I get home later this week and hopefully, progress is being made on the condo. I am making increased payments on the house on the water to catch up with payments I missed when I so unexpectedly landed up there again, and so far, have managed to do that.

End of the World Burger at Umami Hamburgers

End of the World Burger at Umami Hamburgers

All this means that I have to live extremely frugally and I really hesitated coming here but as my ultra-generous son insisted and has treated me royally while here, I am so glad I did. We have spent some wonderful time together here at the apartment and yesterday at the Los Angeles Contemporary Museum of Art and eating amazing Umami Hamburgers. Later today we will take a walk over to the Farmers Market which is just down the street. We went last week and I was amazed at the variety and quality of the produce and food. Fun!

I’ve been driving Ryan’s extra car that he is in the process of selling, and have been up to Apple Valley to see Cody, Mel and the little boys a couple of times. What little characters they have become! Oliver is four now and Everett two. He is such a cutie and all boy! I will go up there on Christmas Day.

Also went down south to Cardiff to see my dear friends, Steve and Cathy. Those people are salt of the earth and I so love seeing them. As usual, as it is now a tradition, they took me to Fidel’s restaurant where we had a lovely Mexican dinner and a nice surprise when Brynn (their daughter) and her husband Garth and their very new twins and 2-year old showed up as well. Spent the night and headed out early as Ryan and Les were expecting a delivery at the apartment at 11. I was expecting traffic but so far, on all my little forays out into the hustle and bustle, the only time I have hit the dreaded LA traffic was when I left for Cardiff and it took me 45 minutes to go a couple of miles!

I had an amazing Kangen water experience. Ryan doesn’t have a machine – yet – so I was drinking their filtered water for the first few days but I started getting headaches and not feeling so hot, tired and just out of sorts. So I checked around and found a water store not far from here and she agreed to let me have water whenever I needed it. So took a quick drive over there, filled my two 5 litre bottle/bags and my drinking bottle. Within three minutes of inhaling almost a full litre, my headache was gone! Now that is no coincidence! And I found a place close by that actually sells it for a buck a gallon so I won’t have to be without while here any more.

What a relief!

I think the best part of being here is seeing for myself that Ryan is healthy and that he is pretty much completely healed. He has such a positive attitude and has done everything he was told to do by his health professionals (not all Western medicine :) ). So that sets my mind at ease and I can go back up to the cold in a few days, knowing that when he tells me he is doing fine, I can rest assured that he is.

 

Not Much Has Changed

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olympic mountains

Olympic Mountain sunset

I’ve been here in the house now for two weeks. It feels like just yesterday when I walked in to find the disaster!

It’s all cleaned up now, the yard cleaned up and – mostly – weeded. But this time of year, the weeds pop up faster than I can keep up!

My boxes are still all packed up and stored upstairs. So I don’t have my “stuff” around as I don’t plan on being here for long, one way or another!

I’ve been doing the soul-destroying job search. A couple of prospects with a phone interview tomorrow – provided he calls as promised! Sounds interesting, but until I know more about it and whether it is actually funded and a going concern, I am not getting excited! I would much rather have ecology come through, as I doubt if I will ever find a job I enjoy as much, around a subject that intrigues me, with something new and exciting happening every day.

So I remain optimistic but am taking the necessary steps to find something else, if my optimism is misplaced!

But the best news is that every time I talk to Ryan, he is doing better and better. He still can’t do any exercise, has to wait another five weeks, but overall he is doing great!

Buddy eyesThe weather has not been cooperating much; a few hours here or there of sunshine. Usually late in the day when there is little warmth left in it. I have had the heater on most days. And the summer solstice is just 10 days away! We are having global cooling up here.

Still loving my little camera – the mountain pix above is zoomed out to 600 – pretty incredible. Then I can get close-up like Buddy’s eyes.

But like any camera, there is still a lot to learn about it but what fun!

So overall, not much has changed. Just keeping on, moving forward, day at a time, step by step.

So Here For the Summer

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The house is clean, the yard semi-done but this time of year, it seems like it constantly needs care.

The main reason I am here, the kitties, are fine. They were sort of freaky when I first got here. I think Chris was not here much at all – from their behaviour and the state of the place.

It is just amazing to me that someone can spin out like that, be totally illogical and paranoid. This episode is far worse than any I have experienced around him – and I have seen a lot! All because he didn’t want to sign a rental agreement! Oh well, his loss.

So I have a roof over my head and a place for the summer. Then who knows?

It’s been raining for the last couple of days and not getting much above 55F (12C) so not pleasant at all. However, this hasn’t stopped the osprey from fishing. Every evening, around 5 he shows up (or she, not sure!) and cruises and fishes the estuary. The image is shot with my new camera, zoomed to 600! Pretty amazing for a little camera like this! Love it!

I keep hearing that ecology is going to produce and keep holding the vision but my enthusiasm for the project is waning. So once again, looking for something else to do! But it is very discouraging – same reasons as always – bad economy, wrong age, wrong industry. But will keep on keeping on.

I think when the weather improves, I will feel better.

On a more cheerful note, Ryan is doing fantastically well as is Cody! So then I think – what else really matters?

New Camera

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Yesterday, I got the camera I have been wanting! The Panasonic Lumix FZ150 and it is soooo cool! It’s light and seems to do just about everything I want it to do, including video! Tested it this morning and I think I will get the hang of it really fast.

At the beginning of the week, I shipped off my Canon 30D to B&H Photo as a trade in. As much as I loved that camera, it was just too big and heavy for me. And so “in your face” and as I am not doing any pro work any more, this little camera is going to be just fine.

daisy

One of the first pix I took with my new camera

Ryan is well on the mend and goes back to work next week. Although he would have liked to have gone back earlier, the sciatica he has been suffering from has actually been (I think) a blessing in disguise as he has had time to rest, see all the doctors and recuperate. The position he is going back into hopefully won’t be as stressful and he isn’t required to travel, something he is not supposed to do for another month or so.

Wednesday, I go to Port Townsend. Betsy will be back here on Friday. It will be interesting going up there to the cold weather again although it is almost the summer solstice but it is typically Washington weather at the moment. At least I know I won’t be staying there forever! I will be a visitor who can oooh and aaah about how beautiful it is —– and then leave!

SoCal Update

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First, a Ryan update. He is recovering well from surgery. That part has been close to miraculous! He has seen his doctors and they are pleased with his progress but his sciatica kicked in big time. He has been pretty much bed-ridden since coming home from the hospital. He’s had all kinds of painkillers etc but I think the only thing that is going to help is time – and patience! And that is not something he has inherited from me. I hope that tomorrow will find him back at work!

Daddy's goggles and boots = superman

Once Ryan was settled at home, I went up to Apple Valley in the high desert to see Cody, Mel and the little boys. They have grown so much in the three months since I saw them! Both as cute as can be and extremely active. Meaning you have to be young to be a parent and have the boundless energy to keep up with the kids!

The area is all desert, the yards decorated mostly with multicolored gravel and desert plants. With limited water, there are very few grass patches. But we went for a drive around Spring Valley Lake which is a man-made lake surrounded by typically southern California type suburban homes. It has a clubhouse, pool, tennis courts, a beach and boats and marinas. A real surprise way out there. And the bonus is, it is extremely inexpensive to rent out there. A 4 bedroom, 3 bath house is just on $1000 a month! It would take some getting used to, living in that barren sort of environment, but it would be fun to be close to the little boys and a good place for them to visit with water and beach close at hand.

Now I am staying at Betsy’s while she is away for three weeks. Getting here was a challenge and a story in itself!

To go up to Apple Valley, I rented a car which needed to be returned in Burbank, close to Ryan’s house. Betsy’s place is in Seal Beach, a 1.5 hour (no traffic) drive. It turned out that the day I was to return the car, there was no way for me to get from the rent-a-car place to Seal Beach. Ryan not driving, Les working and Betsy already left!

So I resorted to public transportation – and THAT was an experience! A 1.5 hour trip took almost 5 hours to complete.

First of all I had to figure out the schedules. And being inter-county, coordinate two disparate bus systems. I finally – I thought – figured out. The start was right near the rent-a-car drop off so I thought I had it made! What I hadn’t factored in was you pretty much need to know the area before you try to work out where the bus stops are. So first off, I ended up at a stop going the wrong direction! I sort of got a funny feeling that I was turned around so asked someone also waiting, and sure enough, I needed to be across the intersection on the other side of the street to get the right bus!

Fortunately, I hadn’t missed the one I needed and climbed aboard. Being a “senior,” this bus only cost me .25. There weren’t a lot of people on board this leg. The announcements of which stop coming up, then approaching and then arriving became rather annoying, but at least I wasn’t going to miss my stop. At one stop, a young man in a wheelchair, with his little dog boarded and he was so stoned… he reeked of pot and he was certainly a happy chappy!

That first leg ended at the iconic Hollywood and Vine intersection. The bus trip planner said to get the Red Line to my next departure point. OK, where is the Red Line station? Not realizing that it was the subway, I was totally at a loss until I asked a little old lady where it was, and she told me in very broken, Russian-accented English that it was across the street – the Subway!

Here I was in the middle of Los Angeles, earthquake central, getting ready to go on the underground! Oh well, as they say “In for a penny, In for a pound!” Besides, if I didn’t take the leg I had mapped out, I had absolutely no clue how to get to the third leg of the trip! So I descended into the bowels of the Metro. First I had to figure out the payment system which of course didn’t want to take my quarter! When I finally managed to shove the coin in the slot, head through the gates and get to the right platform, the damn train was heading away into the tunnel.

underground

Metro station at Hollywood and Vine

The station was really attractively tiled and the ceiling covered with old film reels. It was very clean, although at this station I didn’t see any Metro personnel to ask questions.

By this time I was getting a little frazzled, with no idea which direction I was supposed to go. So again, I asked and a very helpful young man directed me to the right platform and showed me where the map of the system was. So then it was about a 10 minute wait for the next train, which whisked me off to the Blue Line station which was in the same terminal at my next stop. Fortunately, this time there was an official Metro person to direct me to the right platform.

This train, from downtown to Long Beach was packed! Standing room only. Lucky for me I managed to snag a seat, but I did see a young Hispanic man get up and offer his seat to an older lady, so chivalry is not totally dead! At one stop, an old Mexican guy got on, selling chocolate bars – 2 for $1 – I wondered how old they were and then he was off the next stop before he could be thrown off! Gotta make a buck, somehow!

Ninety-nine percent of the passengers had much darker complexions than me! The shades ranged from Nigerian blue-black to cafe au lait and everything in between. I felt like I was back in South Africa, a definite minority! Ryan had expressed concern about me taking this particular train as it goes through some very rough areas of the city;  Watts, South Central and other not so salubrious areas! Graffiti decorated the walls lining the tracks and the houses looked very rundown and tatty. But I had no problems and felt quite at ease with the whole situation. The train made at least 14 stops before we got to Long Beach, where again I ran into the issue of which way do I go! Asked again and once again, was going to head in the wrong direction!

Each of the first three legs cost me a quarter, all three being in Los Angeles County. The fourth leg was a local city bus which cost me sixty cents. The further south I went, the more the bus cost! The last leg, from Long Beach to Seal Beach, one of the shortest legs, cost $1.25 – and that was the senior fare! No wonder fewer people take public transportation down here.

But during the two train legs – not once was I asked for my ticket so wonder how many of the other passengers were actually stowaways!

For me, this trip was an experience, an adventure. Fun to do – once. But for the majority of riders, this is their only means of transportation and I can only imagine the frustration of having to deal with it every day. Waiting, changing trains/buses/tubes and dealing with the masses. We are very fortunate having our own wheels to come and go as we please.

I was very happy to get off the last bus at almost 7pm, walk the last couple of blocks and pop a bottle of wine. Sleep came easily and early.

Ryan is Home

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After 10 nerve-wracking days, Ryan is home and doing amazingly well! Isn’t youth marvelous?

The final results of the tests showed that the tumor was indeed malignant but the surgeons got it all, with clean margins. They labeled it a low grade gastrointestinal stromal tumor, basically meaning that it was very slow growing and had not spread. So that was the good news. And it is treated with targeted medications that work only on the specific cells in the gut. So no chemo or anything like that. He will take the medications for about a year and apparently, from what they docs say, he should be fine but will need to be checked every year.

It was a very close call and thank goodness he was where he was when it happened. Fifteen minutes later he could have been on the freeway and then that could have been totally catastrophic.

His recovery is amazing. Once they took the tube that went through his nose down to the stomach to keep it drained was removed on Tuesday (I think, lost track of days) and he was able to eat or at least have liquids, the turnaround was very fast. With no food for all those days, he lost 18 pounds! The initial offerings were meager but appreciated and now he is on a “soft” diet which is pretty much everything except raw, hard fruit and veges, nuts and whole grains. After a couple of weeks, he will be back to normal.

I brought him home yesterday to his house in Encino, much to Les and his roommates joy – and Rascal was overjoyed to see him, too. The most difficult part of his recovery I think, is making sure he doesn’t overdo things and rests when he needs to. So I hope that going back to work on Monday isn’t going to be too tiring for him.

Today I hooked up my Kangen water machine as I want him to have the best nourishment and care he can possibly get. Of course, the tap I wanted to use was an oddball size, so spent the morning driving around to find an adapter. Now its working and I am happy to have my water back.

Tomorrow I was going up to the desert to see Cody and family, but Ryan asked me to stay for and extra day as Les is going to work and he wants me to stay around to help him if necessary which of course I am happy to do.

Next week, I will make plans for the next phase of my life. Right now, I am just so grateful I was able to be here for this horrendous event. I don’t think I would have survived staying in South Africa.

 

Ryan Update

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Ryan is on the mend but it is going to be a long haul. But he is young and otherwise healthy and determined. I know he is improving because he is getting impatient! I never thought I would see that as a positive indication!

He was sleeping when I got there in the early this afternoon. I had woken at 3:30 this morning, got up for a while, had coffee (decaf I found out later – thanks, Betsy) went back to bed around 6 and slept til 9:30. I sat in the chair and watched him, all hooked up to drips and machines that monitor everything. It was heartbreaking, this my oldest little boy who was born in that hospital, just off the critical list with a condition that hit like a sledgehammer, with no warning.

The tumor is called an gastrointestinal stromal tumor. The initial biopsy results are good; non-malignant but all the results are not in yet, so we must wait.

While I was there, the doctor came in and said he is making a fast recovery and they should be able to remove the stomach tube tomorrow. This is what Ryan is complaining about. It goes through his nose into his stomach to keep it drained and it is very uncomfortable. He hasn’t had anything to eat or drink since he had surgery on Wednesday and he knows that once he starts to get some real food into his system, he will recover faster. But he has to wait til tomorrow to reach that milestone.

He is up and walking too. We walked around the nursing station twice, avoiding others walking slower! This is essential as it keeps his circulation going and helps expel the fluids from his stomach. I pushed the IV stand along with him, I never ever envisioned this. But I have to keep reminding myself that he is so lucky to have had this happen where he was. If it had happened 15 minutes later, he could have been on the freeway with horrendous consequences. As it was, he was with Randy and close to Hoag Hospital, which is one of the best in the U.S. Ryan said today, not acknowledging the freeway implications, but that if it had happened later, he would have been taken to some god-forsaken hospital in some seedy part of Los Angeles! And what might the results have been? We don’t think about that.

So I am staying with Betsy at the “Loveshack” tonight and June (who is Chelsea my old cat’s foster mum) has offered me a place while Ryan is down here, bless her! Then when he is released, will go up to Encino. Then Les can go back to work.

And after that…who knows?

I just know that it was essential that I be here and even though it might have seemed a precipitous move on my part given my financial situation, it is the only move that made – and still makes – any sense to me.

Major Shift in Plans

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Tonight I leave South Africa to go back to California, a major change in plans and not under the best circumstances.

Ryan just had major emergency surgery and had a large tumor removed from the lower intestine. He lost a lot of blood but is in stable condition at Hoag, the best hospital around and incidentally, where he was born.

It has been just too stressful to be this far away from my family, but thank goodness for technology as I was on Skype and imessage a whole lot yesterday and was able to stay in contact. But it is not the same thing at all as being there.

So I made the decision to go back as soon as I could and got a flight on Emirates that leaves this evening and gets in on Friday U.S. time. So I will pack up and be gone. Very sad to leave here like this but sometimes things happen and it seems the Universe is pushing me that way, so I am not going to fight it.

Once I get there, I will stay either at Ryan’s or with Cody and Mel. Right now I am just concentrating on getting there and seeing everyone, especially Ryan. Les has a week off work so will be there, but when Ryan comes home, I will be around to help him out. The doctors say he will be able to go back to work in a couple of weeks. He just started a new job, but they have someone filling in for him so he hasn’t lost the job, which I am sure has set his mind at ease.

So off I go to pack and go into zone neutral for 30+ hours until I land.

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My handsome boys - Everett, Cody, Ryan and Oliver

What a great trip I had. 

From northwest to East Coast to SoCal, my experiences ran the gamut.

My last post was from back east and then when I got to SoCal, I was just too busy with family to post anything. So this is just a brief catch up til now.

The main thing that came out of this trip, besides a lot of fun, was how much I miss being around Ryan and Cody and the little ones. And out of that came two more trips down there; one in November for Cody’s Firefighter graduation and the other over Christmas. Tickets already booked. After that, I will know more about my house loan situation and can make a more educated decision about where I am going.

It’s already really cold here – yesterday didn’t get over 50F and last night was near freezing, and I heard that La Nina is expected this winter so we can expect the same as last year. Not good.

Everett has my gap

But the nuts and bolts of the trip. I flew into Burbank as it is so much easier for Ryan to pick me up there. Spent a few days then headed up to Apple Valley to see Cody, Mel and the little boys. Oliver and Everett are soooo cute, yes, more than grandma cute! So it was great to spend the days playing with them, but also trying to work. They are such time wasters! We took them to a pumpkin patch which was a lot of fun. Went to the local farmer’s market at the college where Cody is training and actually saw him in full firefighter gear, much to Oliver’s delight! Back down to Encino, and a trip with Betsy to Carpinteria to meet my Ecology people. That in itself made the whole trip worthwhile (almost) as now I can put faces to names.

Love that Tonka truck

The day before I headed back north, Ryan and I spent a wonderful day together. I love Les, but it was so good to have Ryan all to myself. We went shopping – seeing as I had got rid of all my winter clothes ready for tropical living – then to brunch out in Topanga Canyon at the Inn of the Seventh Ray. I fell in love with the canyon and it is quite possible that it is the place I go in the near future. When I go back down next month, I am going to explore it a little more. After that, we went wine tasting at Malibu Wines and then home to pack.

All in all, I couldn’t have asked for a better trip. I feel rested, happy to be working and ready to take on the world.

Gorgeous weather

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Finally…

Yesterday was beautiful and today is equally so. The crystal clear blue skies we get in the early summer, morning light golden on the new leaves across the water. A super high tide, water glassy with reflections. No complaints here … except the water should be 30+ degrees warmer! Not too much longer to wait for that.

Veges are finally growing; it has taken weeks and weeks for them to start, the weather has been so awful and cold. The tulips are over, but some of the irises are out with more budding. The rhodies are just starting to flower – just in time for Rhody Week in Port Townsend. Hopefully the weather will hold for the parades and festivities.

Unfortunately, I have to be inside a lot of today as we are putting together 5000 little bags of nuts for a promotion. So we have to stick on the labels and then fill the little suckers. I have help, there is no way I could do it all myself! But I get paid, that’s a new concept!

Editing is going well, although I won’t be doing much this week, with all the nutty business, but it looks like it will serve me well when I am out of the country. I’m getting really excited about the move. Bill, a fellow I am corresponding with on Bocas, told me there are quite a few South Africans who have moved there and he will introduce me. So it won’t be too traumatic to move there on my own. Still not sure if Susan will go at the same time. But I am pretty set on doing the language immersion for a few weeks. I think it is very important.

I am so proud of my sons. Ryan starts on Hell’s Kitchen as Supervising Producer. Moving from American Idol and up the ladder. Next title I think is C0-Executive Producer. He has really worked hard, and continues to work hard at his career. And all that hard work is paying off.

And Cody! On his different path. An EMS and soon-t0-be firefighter! But that suits him. I never suspected a leaning towards this, but he is such a caring person, and so physical, this is perfect for him. Not to mention the financial rewards are much higher than carpentry production. Once he is a firefighter, he will have time to pursue his hobbies, his art and furniture making.

I am blessed. And when I go to Panama, I will miss them, but suspect I might see them more than I do now, when they come down on vacation.